It Must Be Love

By Amber Brenner-

Every day in school, we see couples roaming the halls, holding hands, clinging to each other, laughing and making all of us single teens want to barf. But we are most certainly NOT jealous. We don’t want that. So for all of you who insist that we are jealous and lonely, leave us alone. We just want to barf.

We all know the couple about whom I’m referring. They walk slowly through the halls as though they are meandering through a field of wildflowers. They dramatically swing their arms back and forth and back and forth, clinging to one another’s hands. They decide to stop in the middle of the hall. They say goodbye to each other for the block as though one is going away to war. They caress each others’ faces, and they hug, and they kiss. And the whole time, you just want them to move out of your way so you can get to class before you vomit.

I’m sorry, but I would just prefer to not see the tongues of two people flapping around inside and around the outside each other’s mouths. I’d rather see your slimy and repulsive ABC food.

Now I’m not saying that I think teen love is gross. I just think teens lovin’ up on each other in the halls is revolting. The idea in the majority of the pubertal minds we have to encounter, unwillingly, throughout the day seems to be that shoving one’s tongue down another’s throat, leaving slobber and marks all over their bodies, and groping each other in the halls means you are definitely in love.

“Love” must be so yummy.

But somehow, these couples make me a tad green at times. No, I don’t mean they always make me sick and want to vomit. I mean I am green with envy. Yes, I may be a bit jealous, but I don’t want to be a part of a grody teen couple in the halls.

I just want someone who wants to be that with me. I want the choice to not be like that. I want to choose to not be disgusting.

But sadly, instead I’m stuck with the feelings of envy and nausea. They still make me want to vomit, even if I do wish I could be in their shoes.